its peanut butter jelly time…

well really, it’s baby time.

i’ve been tectonically moving in that direction but am now thoroughly convinced that i’m ready, and this is what i want to do. my whole life i’ve had this sneaking suspicion that there was something i was meant to do. that i was a born expert, prodigy, natural at…something…but just hadn’t discovered what that was. didn’t have the passion to pursue what that was even if i felt a twinge of “hey i’m pretty good at this”. though i did pursue yoga and though there aren’t “good yogis” or “bad yogis” i’m pretty good at it…at least i’m a decent teacher and have good proprioception or body awareness…but maybe, i’m just meant to be a mama. maybe that’s been it all along. and i’m sure i’ll freak out about a gazillion things between now and then but there it is.

the wisdom of a life in reverse…

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“For what it’s worth: it’s never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of. If you find that you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again.”

- Benjamin Button

perhaps i’m late to the party, but i went to see this film over the weekend and it rocked me to my very core. i’m still trying to put into words all that i felt and am still feeling. it is such a poetic piece and it has made me look at my life again with fresh eyes and it has reminded me to live a life i’m proud of every day. it’s just beautiful…the story, the cinematography, the message. i completely lost myself to it, and now i’m humbled and inspired…i moved here to the beach to live a simple life because i know in my heart and soul that it’s the simple things that really do make me the happiest, and if i’m unhappy, it’s because i’m not paying attention to the moments, the millions of tiny, daily miracles. none of us have a lot of time here, but just imagine how much more time you’d seem to have if you lived each moment.

(image used with permission by david alan harvey, a man who has lived a life without limits and, in his own way, starts over again every morning…)

so i drew a new face and i laughed…

thanks mads for sending this along! while i’m not usually a jason mraz fan – the island sound of this song just struck me on this cold winter morning. it warmed me up from the inside and i was able to appreciate the clear blue skies and the sunshine beaming through my windows. i rolled out my mat and found a nice little yoga flow dance to get my day started. and well, it’s just such a happy, bouncy, smiley, optimistic song i had to share it too…i love the message of love and taking a situation and simplifying it of its complications or turning it around into something beautiful.

“open up your heart and you’ll find love, love, love, love…”

see if you can listen and not smile yourself!

xo!

hope…

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many blessings to you president obama…

the literal weight of the world is riding on your shoulders and i can see in your face that you completely understand the gravity of our situation. we are trusting you to lead our country and the world into a better place. i am thankful that you are such a thoughtful man, that you have chosen many wise advisors, and that you have such a smart and supportive family to give you strength. know too that there are millions of us sending you energy and prayers to help you guide our country and the world into peace and prosperity.

live this moment…with love and gratitude.

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(image by shephard fairey)

…cybernating…

i made this word up the other day. (i think…maybe it’s already out there in the world?)

barb‘s query “wherever did you go” to my i *might* be back post has been bouncing around in my brain…and i think living in this seasonal, touristy place had me offline and off in the world for the summer, and well, it appears the fall also. i was teaching & managing the studio, doing lots of private yoga classes, doing way too much driving up and down the bypass, working at a wonderful new restaurant at night, and working on a few writing projects. to be perfectly honest, the only thing i miss about the past few months is the warm sun.

it was a long summer and fall of soul searching too, with a little running away and avoiding thrown in for good measure. but now it’s cold and the soul searching has gotten deeper and i find i’m hibernating and spending much more time on-line seeking out kindred spirits – hence cybernating – and creating a little art space/office/cave while trying to find the bravery to do art. i have felt a block in my body for a long time about art… a deep ache reminding me of something i lost a long time ago. i’m trying to find my way back. to not judge and just do. to put brush to canvas or glue to image or fabric and make something. it’s been fun. and really hard – more than one ‘creative sunday’ has been tear-filled. but i’ve birthed one small piece. with another in the works…so we’ll see.

i guess that’s where i’ve been…what about you? do you have a similar seasonal, energetic or creative cycle?

xo*m

p.s. i also found myself out in the redwoods in northern california, north of humboldt. months later i still dream about them….

tree within the redwood trees